To tell you the truth, I have been really looking forward to this school year. I had absolutely no expectation that it would be perfect, but I feel like I have spent the last few years learning how to be a teacher, and maybe this year, it would finally all connect.
I was looking forward to investing into my students a little more personally. In the past I have been very hit and miss. When I was investing, I was killing it, but I often reached the point of burn-out quickly, then would go for a while not investing the way I really wanted to.
This year I was very excited to see where 422History would go. I launched a website over the summer, celebrated my one year anniversary with the store, and had a lot of excitement about the things that were coming in the near future.
Personally, I was planning an awesome holiday season kicked off with my husband’s 30th birthday in a few weeks. I was so looking forward to a trip of a lifetime to Israel next fall. My home was coming together. My dog was settling in. Finances were starting to normalize.
Life finally seemed to be on the upswing. Like I had hit my stride.
Then God changed my plans.
He knew a year ago when we bought this house, my beloved house (that I now have eight days left with), that we would turn around and sell it in less than a year. He knew that when we rescued this crazy, wild dog, that so many days I would sit on living room floor hugging my dog and crying. He knew that when we planned and prayed for that trip to Israel that He was going to send us on the adventure of a lifetime instead. And He knew (the one that hurts the most) that when I packed up my classroom in May that I would never teach history in that classroom again.
God changed my plans.
1 Kings 19:11-12 shares a glimpse into the life of the prophet Elijah. At a moment when Elijah was down, God sent him to stand at the top of a mountain and God changed Elijah’s life.
And he said, Go forth, and stand upon the mount before the Lord. And, behold, the Lord passed by, and a great and strong wind rent the mountains, and brake in pieces the rocks before the Lord; but the Lord was not in the wind: and after the wind an earthquake; but the Lord was not in the earthquake: And after the earthquake a fire; but the Lord was not in the fire: and after the fire a still small voice.
This summer has been my Elijah Mountain Moment. I remember clear as day the Monday night when God told my husband and I to stand on a mountain – not literally, of course, but spiritually. Two days later, He sent the wind and broke the rocks. That was a day of trial that I hope to never experience again. A frightening and terrifying experience and heart-breaking experience to be sure, followed shortly by the earthquake. By the end of the summer, we faced the fire, and when all that was said and down, we heard the still small voice of God, and He was calling us away. Away from the life of comfort, the life of security, the life of our dreams, and He changed our plans. It was my Elijah Mountain Moment and it broke my heart.
In God’s still small voice, He has blessed us beyond our wildest imagination. To be honest, it is so wild, I am still trying to process it all. This past Sunday my husband started a new job in a different state as a youth pastor at a fantastic church. All the little things that we had prayed for and didn’t even dare to ask God for, He has provided with this church. It is amazing to see how He has answered prayer and it truly has been through His still small voice. We have peace in moving forward. We are still a little in awe of that wind, earthquake, and fire, but where HE leads we will follow.
So what does that mean?
Well, it means I feel like I am on a roller coaster. It means that I am no longer an employed high school history teacher. I hope once we settle into our new home that I can look for a teaching job. It means that we are no longer home-owners. It means that my husband has the job that he has prayed for for six years, even though it isn’t where we hoped it would be. It means that I have the first opportunity in six years of marriage to prepare meals for my husband and keep the house clean daily, rather than weekly. It means that a lot of things are going to be different.
I look forward to seeing where God leads, how He leads, and how He chooses to bless over these next few years. It will be different and at this point, I have no idea what the future holds for me, but I do know that God is in control.